Things to do when dating a latina


12 Things You Should Never Do While Dating A Latina, As Illustrated By Aubrey Plaza

Boy tilts his head and examines the contrast of freckles on her cheeks to her pale skin and her blue, piercing eyes. Her hair is dark brown and thin. He mentally notes her present but not protruding rear end. And then boy will be stuck tapping into the Sofia Vergara and Jennifer Lopez analogies that have put Latinas at the forefront of popular culture, but often make their physical standards a social crutch during real life exchanges.

Sure, these women are stunning and have helped create an appreciation for curvature some men and adolescent boys did not even realize existed or more so, that they even wanted but they are not the blanket casing.

Latin America is a true mash up of skin tones and ethnic backgrounds; meaning there are no real physical outliers for the Latina woman. In the Caribbean and coastal Latin America, African slaves, indigenous tribes, and Spanish Europeans collided, leading to myriad physical outcomes. Some Latinas cannot tan because their skin is too pale. Well buddy, if you live in planet earth, then I regret to inform that this will never happen during your lifetime.

Because if she was born in Latin America and you have fucked her more than a couple of times, then I can assure you that there will be a point in which she will try to check all of your next moves. She will want to know where you are, what you are up to and whom are you with. And it will be this latter point the one she will be more obsessed about, as she will have a constant fear that you will be in the presence of attractive women and flirting with them or, worst case scenario, banging them and therefore questioning you all the time what are you up to.

And I can tell you that in most of the cases their jealously will exceed the acceptable standards — including scenes, tantrums and even some light violence — so it is up to you to assess the situation carefully and to leave immediately if you detect some red flags, before your life turns into a living hell.

They need a strong lead I know that this is true for all type of women but it is ten times truer for these warm-blooded girls.

8 things you should know before dating a Latina

Even if they tell you the opposite, they really enjoy a man who can command them or even be harsh to them. The funny thing is that they call me many times a sexist or a male chauvinist, but the truth is that I have never had a single Latin woman who has left me because of the way I treat them. In fact, in all the cases they have even gotten more attached to me, sometimes falling in love and obsessed with me which is not good, like referred on the previous point. Looking at the list above, I would say that there are unarguably two positive points, five which can be either negative or positive — it is question of perspective, meaning how you look and react towards these points — and one which only depends on you and influences the way all the other seven factors work together.

Starting with the two positives, whoever type of man you are, I bet all my chips that you enjoy having a woman who knows both how to take care of the household and how to satisfy your little friend down there.

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  • Tips For Dating A Latina.

Concerning the former, I cannot think of a better way a woman can prove her femininity and nurturing skills than when she commits with pleasure to such activities as cooking a fine dish or putting the whole house in order. Regarding the latter, sex is one of the most natural activities a human being can practice, so if it is done in an exciting way then the world will surely become a better place I can imagine that sexual frustration is one of the main reasons why so many guys commit suicide or kill other people in atrocious attacks.

And yes, Latinas know how to do it and they make sure you enjoy the ride, in order that you repeat it over and over again. But if Latinas were roses without thorns, then I would not be writing this article, would I?

Load the Pistol

Well and the raw truth is that they have a handful of factors which can drive every man crazy in the bad sense of the word. Either you accept it, see it as a positive thing — because in the end if she is talking a lot it is because she likes you — and put it as a background noise or I strongly recommend you to jump out of the boat as quickly as you can, otherwise you will go mad sooner than you think. Second, you have to get ready to be next to a person who will spend more money in one day than your grandfather in a lifetime. The modern societies are getting more and more consumerist, mostly because we are giving the resources — money and time — like never before to women.

And guess what they do in the presence of these two elements? Yes, you got it: And by some work of destiny, it seems that Latinas were programmed to spend even more than the regular women, so if you are someone who do not waste money in shit and gets annoyed very easily by someone who does it, then you must avoid these female spenders at all costs. Then, can you bear the fact that the Latina you are with is constantly seeking and putting herself as center of the attention? I recommend you to think twice before you answer.

Dating a Latina: Expectations vs. Reality

Want discretion while dating such a girl? Forget it, you will not have it.

So in the end you should assess whether the hotness, femininity and devotion hopefully, if you do things right compensates the clutter and the fuss inherent to a Latina who by every means loves to signal herself to others. And talking about how she relates with all the people but you, be ready that she will literally throw herself at others , just because the physical contact is so deep-rooted in her DNA that not even Isaac Newton would have the slight idea how to remove that trait from a person.

While a German woman girl greets someone with a handshake, a Peruvian hugs and kisses that person on the cheek; while a Japanese woman laughs timidly when a male friend releases a teasing joke, the Mexican woman laughs out loud and even slaps the bastard on the shoulder. The list of examples are endless, just as the possibilities of having a nervous breakdown, in case you are a person who wanted a sophisticated partner and just ended up with a show-off lover!

While this can be good if done within healthy limits, the reality is that women are emotional beings, so if you find a Latina who can reach this balance, make sure to stay with her because you have found a gem. Still, I am only talking about the positive side of jealously — when she likes you and wants to control every move of yours — because if I refer when you cheat on your Latina girlfriend, she eventually discovers it and you get caught, then my friend, you will literally enter hell.

The sweet angel sudden becomes a rancorous, resentful and wicked devil who will make sure that not only everyone knows about your actions the last time it happened to me, it involved the , the police and some photos of me naked in the hands of other people but also that she turns into a big slut, banging all the possible guys — including some friends of yours, if possible — just for you to understand whom you should have never messed with. Or that special person your friends set you up on a blind date with. Either way, if she's Latina there are a couple of things you might want to avoid doing, or saying.

To help you out we've put together these tips on what not to do if you're on a date with a Latina, with some help from the amazing Aubrey Plaza. Ask her to say something in Spanish Stop assuming all Latinas speak Spanish.

5 Things To Know So You Don't Offend Your New Latina Girlfriend

Stop assuming we'd want to speak Spanish to you. Immediately assume she wants a margarita.

Either you accept it, see it as a positive thing — because in the end if she is talking a lot it is because she likes you — and put it as a background noise or I strongly recommend you to jump out of the boat as quickly as you can, otherwise you will go mad sooner than you think. Not that we don't like them, but there are many other amazing, famous Latinas out there. Boy tilts his head and examines the contrast of freckles on her cheeks to her pale skin and her blue, piercing eyes. But if Latinas were roses without thorns, then I would not be writing this article, would I? No matter which phase of life they are at or whether they are single or married with children, these warm-blooded women will always find a way to make use of their money: The truth is that Latinas are usually warm-blooded and that is reflected in everything they do including, of course, sex.

I'll have a margarita.